Argue without breaking up: 5 simple rules every couple needs to know

You can be deeply in love with your partner and still clash over opinions, expectations, or everyday decisions. Conflict is a natural part of any close relationship. But in romantic relationships, often times conflicts blow out of proportion, even leading to seperation. Here are some simple rules you must follow during the arguments with your partner. This way you can stand your ground, be civil, and not damage the relationship.

Yes, you might be angry at your partner. It is a natural response when you are hurt, or misunderstood. But that is not an excuse to insult your partner. When you are upset, you should watch your language. During these occasions, try to avoid name-calling, character assassination, and remarks that are aimed to wound your relationship. Instead of saying, ‘You are thoughtless and selfish’, tell your partner, ‘I’m frustrated because you forgot our plans’. You cannot take back the words told in anger.

Most people go in circles during arguments, because they are unaware why their partner is upset. So, t is important to communicate. Tell them why you are mad. They may have triggered your anger, but they can be still clueless about it. Don’t assume them to solve the problem on their own. If a specific behavior bothered you, communicate. Clear communication can transform arguments into opportunities for understanding.

Yes, you are mad at your partner. But broadcasting your anger to other will ruin your relationship. You may feel momentary satisfaction, but it will break the trust and respect. Do not vent your anger and frustration to your friends, family, or worse, social media. Instead, address the issue directly, talk to your partner. In a romantic relationship, 3 is always a crowd. Keep that in mind. Even if you share your frustrations to others, they won’t be able to solve the problem. They may indirectly worsen it. So, don’t do that.

Sure, you are mad at your partner now. You perhaps ‘hate’ everything about them now. But, there was also the time when you almost worshipped your partner. Anger has a way of creating tunnel vision. In the heat of the moments, we may forget all the good times. If you have a pattern of doing so. Remind yourself. Recall the good times you had with your partner. How they made you feel secure. How they brought you joy. How they adored you. All these will remind you that they’re not a villain; they’re someone you care about who has disappointed or hurt you.

Now your partner may be at fault, according to you. But take a walk down memory lane. How many times has this person forgiven you? How often have they held you close even when you made mistakes? You are not keeping scores here, but realising that a little forgiveness goes a long way. When you’re angry, remember that you’ve been forgiven too. This simple trick changes the conflict game forever.

Conflicts are bound to happen in romantic relationships. You and your partner are different individuals, regardless of how much you have in common. How you handle conflicts is important. Feel free to fight, but be fair. The payoff will be worth it.